can we leave jonny craig in 2019???? god, looking back at this video there were so many moments i forgot to mention... but still, this video gives you the general idea that, yes, he is a very unhealthy person to date. *pls read caption before leaving any comments talking about my situation like its just fun gossip* i hope this video is received well. i am obviously mourning over the relationship that i so badly wanted this to be, the person i wanted him to be, and then the stark reality of things. I have been planning to post this video on this day for almost a week now, and decided to symbolically leave all of this in 2019 by getting this out there before the new year. Just from what I've shared on Twitter so far, I already feel so good to be able to actually say what happened, not worry about protecting him, and being honest with myself about everything very publicly. If you've never been in this situation, please try not to judge. I am not ashamed to say I loved him even for long after I left him, and am still struggling to see him for who he really is, but this video and speaking up is helping me SO much. This video is for ME, NOT anyone else. I needed to share my story. I needed to stop being quiet. It was ruining all my chances of growth. I kept getting close to relapse, or going back to him to block out the trauma. talking about this and being heard helps me more than i can explain. even if at some parts i'm a crying whiney mess. this helps me so extremely much and I feel so much lighter now that i've said all this. It's more progress in one day than i've made in months when it comes to moving on from this, so thank you for listening.
Again i'm sorry if i do anything wrong in this video, i tried my best, but i know i may get whiney and annoying. it was really hard to revisit the anger he'd express to me in both verbal and physical ways, and i decided to be very raw in this video instead of forcing myself to come off more professional at the cost of diminishing my emotions.
please share in the music scene to not support his new music. the music he released while he was with me were songs that were efforts to love bomb me and make me feel like he truly loved me, and he told me that his next album is also related to our breakup. he's posting that I will never win, he's mocked the things i may post, he's used his pregnancy news to try to spin that i'm just jealous, he's publicly retweeting things using my name, he's threatened me and the other girls in a twitch stream today (12/31/19) along with a victim's mother. He is not stable, he is not safe, and by supporting him, you're telling him he can do these things to these women, gaslight them online, and then call them crazy and move onto the next victim over and over. stop supporting the cycle. he's not growing, he's not changing, it's been 10 years of this over and over. wake up like I did.
*Any money made (if any is?? can't imagine this being monetized, lmao) will be donated. I'll post the specific places I donate to when chosen but they will be a women's survivors program and a drug recovery program, and each will get 50%.
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